hello kitty band-aid
when i am here
i forget where i used to be
when i am not here
please don’t remember
how i kept forgetting
when i am there
i will cash in
all the words i had
for a new body
and i will lay that body
in a road in times square
and hum to my self
hum hum hum
here is my contribution to the "photographs with 'i am like october when i am dead in them'" meme, i guess?
- i will carve a spaceship from my internet flesh
don’t bother trying to call me
i will be busy carving a spaceship from my internet flesh
my need to be wanted
your want to be needed
we laugh
and feel infinite
not in a good way
and neither of us know
that both of us feel infinite
we never say that we are fucked
(forever)
i guess that
if we fucked forever
we would never have to feel
of that time i stopped talking
stopped leaving my room
stopped eating
you didn’t even know that happened
do you like my poems
in radically dissociating
from my body
is to eat
all of this fucking
peanut butter
on a screwed up piece of paper in the trash,
please don’t read it
it hurts when you read it
my writing process
we talked about light speed
paradoxed ourselves dizzy
sat in a field, shaded
in the midst of blinding roads
and felt something
straining us from the grass
what was that
and why did we hold on
- i curl up in the empty bathtub
record myself making baby noises
feel purpose
lay with my phone on my chest
think about living on neptune, tea,
sticky rice
i feel the radiation sink in
imagine it filling gaps where words were
i sleep
sleeping in a bathtub is so nice
————————————————
those are all of the poems
i dedicate them to Poncho Peligroso [ http://ponchopeligroso.com ]
i am sorry i haven’t done this thing in a while
words are hard
a few great things happened while i ‘wasn’t blogging’
i handed out steve roggenbuck’s chapbook to a bunch of people
here are a couple photos of me holding photos of emilie holding copies of ‘i am like october when i am dead’
the first one also has jonny’s foot in it
the second one had too much brightness or something so you can’t see the words and written in biro next to it is “a poem by steve roggenbuck, sort of”
another thing is that Poncho Peligroso sent me a bunch of really neat stuff
including a moleskine notebook, a copy of ‘richard yates’ by tao lin and a copy of ‘eat when you feel sad’ by zachary german
i haven’t written in the moleskine notebook yet, it’s so pretty
i have read all of ‘richard yates’ but have not finished ‘eat when you feel sad’ yet, this is not a comment on the books it’s just the thing that happened
i really liked ‘richard yates’ it made me feel terrible pretty much throughout it
well um here are some more pictures
a note that came with the mail, it says, "Dear Snail Shell Escape Artist, I BELIEVE IN YOU, KEEP IT TOGETHER, YOU'RE A FUCKING POET. sincerely, poncho peligroso"
pretty books on top of pretty moleskine on top of pretty envelope
and the pretty envelope too it says "To: Aurist (who is a ghost)"
so uh yeah thank you so much Poncho Peligroso you are the best
i hope you enjoyed my words and this post or something i guess
here is a list of my favourite 10 releases from 2010, because i can
it will probably change a lot later but i don’t even care i’m making this god damn post
—
1. Forest Swords – Dagger Paths
2. Los Campesinos – Romance is Boring
3. Johnny Foreigner – You Thought You Saw a Shooting Star but Yr Eyes Were Blurred With Tears and That Lighthouse Can Be Pretty Deceiving With the Sky So Clear and Sea So Calm
4. Neverever – Angelic Swells
5. Erykah Badu – New Amerykah Part Two (Return of the Ankh)
6. Baths – Cerulean
7. Islet – Wimmy
8. Nicki Minaj – Pink Friday
9. Scissor Shock – Psychic Existentialism
10. Lil B – Rain in England
—
thank you i don’t know when i will be back
i love this
blee blee blee woo woo swag woo